Eschatology
That four-dollar word in the title line means, according to Merriam-Webster, "a branch of theology concerned with the final events in the history of the world or of humankind." I first encountered the word when exploring strange little subculture of Christianity that is obsessed with "the End Times" (always capitalized) and how they are perpetually just around the corner. Eschatology is the study of endings.
When you think about it, endings constitute a pretty strange thing for Christians to get hung up on. Even the ultimate ending, death (and an ignominious death at that) could not stop God's story. Why should the end of the world be any different?
Each day, the world ends for 151,600 people. Very few of us will see it coming, and none of us know when exactly it will happen. I think a lot of the Bible passages that get trotted out whenever someone wants to make a statement about the End Times are actually about death, about the ending that awaits us all. I think people want there to be some spectacular "end of the world" because, while endings are scary, they're also predictable. We generally know what to expect. We know what chaos looks like, so the trumpets and the horsemen and the seals and all that seem like what the end of the world would be: confusing and painful. Beginnings are more frightening because they can go anywhere. Hope is scary. The New Jerusalem, with its gates that never, ever shut is like nothing we've ever seen.
Unfortunately (and fortunately) for us, all endings are also beginnings; each death contains the seed of its resurrection.
When I graduated from college last May, I felt an enormous sense of relief. I had made it; I had accomplished the goal toward which I had been working for a long time. However, there was also an underlining sense of dread. As I stepped off the stage, diploma in hand, I realized I was lost. Both figuratively and literally. Luckily, there were school staff roaming about to help me find my seat, but in a psychological and spiritual sense, I remained lost. I knew where I was, but also that I could not stay there, and I had no idea where to go next.
I now have a better idea where I am going. I mean, I know I am literally going to Denver: the plane tickets have been bought and everything. However, in that mystical sense from before, I am starting something new, and that is scary, but in the best way possible. I know that, with God's help, I will reach the ending of this journey, whatever it may be. For now, the beginning is full of promise.